This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 1st, 2008 at 4:56 am and is filed under Family Stuff. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
As many of you know, our daughter, Frankie, is three years old. And, we are proud to announce that she will be starting school in September! Thats right, our little girl is all grown up. Almost. You see, apparently preschools nowadays think its funny to bestow undo stress and ageda onto the lives of unsuspecting parents, by nonchalantly stating (after they’ve taken your check) “Oh, and she has to be potty trained”, as they walk out of the room.
We have bragged about every aspect of our daughter. Her vocabulary, her appearance, her willingness to kick butt and take names at any challenge we place in front of her…you name it. But the bottom line is, the girl ain’t perfect. For whatever reason, we simply can’t seem to convince her that the ole commode is a friend. We’ve tried everything. Nothing works. We thought it would be a great idea to tear down some of the most popular tricks and show you why they are completely useless:
1. Music. We love it. Play it all the time. Do you know how annoying it is to sit in the bathroom for an hour listening to your kid sing “Its a Small World” with no byproduct? Uh uh.
2. Offer a lot of praise. OK, great. Doesn’t your child actually have to use the potty in order to constitute praise?! “That’s awesome, baby….no poop!” Sounds more like sarcasm than praise, right?
3. Read with her. Good call….distract her with a great read. Next.
4. Use a “special potty”. We’ve gone through several, including the most recent one I made from a sterling silver, diamond crusted, 25″ Escalade rim. It has lasers and a fog machine. Also makes julienne fries. Two words: Doesn’t. Help.
5. Use a timer. Supposedly, you set the timer to help both of you remember when its time to go. Hello?! How can I know when she’s going when she does it in the diaper? Sheesh.
6. Set up target practice. Yes, its true. Put some brightly colored cereal or the like in the potty and let them go all Shock and Awe on it. Um….my child is a girl…she’s going to be shooting blind even if I put a chocolate souffle in the hopper.
7. Make them feel proud. See number two.
8. Use treats and surprises. My parents rewarded me when I went to the bathroom with Milk Duds. Now I get a gigantic sugar rush every time I pee. Moving on.
9. Give them stickers. My daughter has about 5 sticker books, and gets a new one in the mail from Grandma about once a week. You think she’s gonna go all crazy because I stick some gold foil star on her wrist? C’mon…she’s got six Smurf puffy stickers in her hand right now. That’s so played.
10. Let them help you throw out the dirty diapers. So you’re supposed to hand a three-year-old a poopy diaper and tell them to throw it in the toilet. Thats like giving Dick Cheney a loaded gun and telling him to go hang out with his friends for a while. Sooner or later, your gonna have a mess on your hands.
So please, we are asking for your help. All of you good lurkers out there need to come to the aid of the party and let us know the following:
What age do you think is realistic for a child to be fully potty trained? and:
What technique did you use that finally had your little one reading the sports section on the Great White Radio?
Let us know…we are on the clock!
Matt & Aline
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July 3rd, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Ditch the diapers completely. Don’t even give her the option of a pull up or a diaper. Put her in panties. She will have accidents for about three days, constantly. It will be horrid. On the fourth day she will come around, and start to go to the potty (with your urging). Keep with it and within a week she will be going on her own. It worked with both my boys - they were both potty trained by 2 1/2. We never had a diaper in the house when we were training them - too convenient for us to fall back on.
Good luck - it will come, I promise. She will not be in college in a diaper
shannons last blog post..A bouncing baby girl!
July 4th, 2008 at 2:34 am
I am the world’s best potty trainer. If you REALLY want some hack’s advice, I can email you. As for age, before college is preferrable. Anything before that is a crap shoot.
July 4th, 2008 at 4:00 am
Our 3 year old will be 4 in a few months and we are 99% done. She is down to not making it through the night a couple of evenings every few weeks or so. This is usually because we let her have liquids too late, but you didn’t want to hear all that. Sorry.
We tried much of what was in your list and it didn’t work for us either. We ended up doing what Shannon recommends and just put her in panties and worked through the mayhem the first few days. She hated it, but not us, and got through it just fine.
The other big motivator was school, as you mention. We simply explained to her that school was not going to be an option if she wasn’t big enough to go to the bathroom. She is crazy independent this one and the thought of not ditching mom or dad for a couple of quality hours with the big kids sealed the deal. Good Luck!
Chucks last blog post..Those things that shape you
July 5th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Ok, I have a question…our eldest Diva is 3.5 and out of using diapers except for overnight and at naptime…we have been a bitreluctant to just get rid of them, but I would love to be able to shed the diapers completely…any thoughts or ideas???
July 7th, 2008 at 1:39 am
Ok, I was in the exact same boat as you. My oldest had no interest. Then…magic happened. Are you ready for this? He watched one of his friends use the potty. And two weeks later, he declared to me “I don’t want to wear diapers anymore. I want to wear big boy undies like my friend.”
NO LIE!!!
We have never looked back. Well, except for the occasional diaper urinal…
McMommys last blog post..A Patriotic POW!
July 7th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
I don’t even like to think of it as potty training, because we all no that it is super hard to convince a child to eat or poo. I have 4 kids, and waiting till they were ready was the best. My oldest was just 3 when she finally decided to go for it, my others were younger even though they were boys. I think seeing siblings with no diapers and using the toilet helped. I agree with the first commenter who said to ditch the diapers and go with underwear- especially seeing as it is summer- that is a good time to try it. There will be accidents, and it may be messy, but it WILL end. Hope all goes well!
halfmoon girls last blog post..Camping and Quiz Answers
July 8th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
I feel your pain. I wish I had some good advice, but I’m at a loss. You already dispelled all the tricks I’ve heard!
I would have to say that Shannon’s idea above sounds like it may work. It may be a little extreme, but drastic times call for drastic measures!
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!
Jennifers last blog post..Happy Independence Day!
July 8th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
I have no advice, but I love your sense of humor, and I do wish you the best of luck! (I also was sure I’d commented already, but maybe it didn’t go through…)
maggies minds last blog post..Over the Rainbow, Somewhere
July 9th, 2008 at 7:53 pm
Just perusing my usual spots and saw this mother is sharing on her potty training experience - scroll-down, a few posts back.
http://chanelleandtristan.blogspot.com/
August 20th, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Potty training is stupid just change diapers