This entry was posted on Thursday, July 16th, 2009 at 9:18 pm and is filed under Family Stuff. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
There comes a point during the first several months following the birth of a new baby when every family hits the wall. In the beginning, joy surrounding the new arrival as well as an omnipresent abundance of adrenaline keep us happy and moving at ludicrous speed. Everyone is comfortable, patient and level-headed; one big happy family so to speak. Then, as lack of sleep and tension created by incessant crying and diaper-changing begins to accumulate, the wall grows from a tiny speck, barely visible on life’s horizon, to an ominous, looming monolith of aggravation and fatigue directly in front of you until, finally, you run full force into the solid stone surface, knocking yourself unconscious. I fear my wife and I may currently be just about one arm’s length from the wall.
Dominick has been in our lives for precisely seven weeks, and in that time things have been not only tolerable, but very pleasant. Frankie has gotten along with him swimmingly, he has been sleeping for acceptable lengths of time and, all in all, things have been pretty good. About a week-and-a-half ago, however, I began to notice some changes. First, I believe my daughter may have begun to realize that her new baby brother was not just visiting from some faraway land, and that he would actually be a permanent guest in her home. She has become more whiney while regressing to baby talk and mashing up her food with her hands, clearly envying the attention that the “baby” was getting and attempting to mimic the behavior that was responsible for it. My son, while still barely able to open his eyes, clearly somehow noticed this new development and decided that HE now was not receiving enough of our time, so he has begun to cry loudly virtually every waking moment he has had, which are many. In addition, the household dog, who I almost forgot we had for a couple of weeks, has felt the brunt of the neglect and has stopped eating in the mornings, which inevitably leads to throw ups in the afternoon. All of this has led to Aline and I basically teetering between the ability to hold it all together and tragically slamming ourselves into the wall at full speed in a brilliant and gory display of carnage and hysterics.
However, I do not like negativity. I don’t like reading it and I certainly do not enjoy feeling it. So I’ve attempted to make myself a little list of the reasons why this particular moment in our lives (which is actually quite short if I were to take a step back and look at my entire lifespan on a timeline), is not really a big deal. I plan to come back and re-read this post often, sometimes with my wife, whenever things get heavy. Little reminders, if you will, of the positives.
1. No matter what day it is, there’s always a weekend coming up.
2. During the evenings at the moment, when I sit in our back yard, its about 75 degrees and breezy. You can’t beat 75 and breezy under a full moon.
3. I have a really cool collection of power tools and my circular saw has a laser on it.
4. I still have a job.
5. Christmas is coming up in five months.
6. I’m not dead.
7. So You Think You Can Dance is on. I love So You Think You Can Dance.
8. I can’t be certain, but I think the McRib may be coming back soon.
9. I finally have a pair of sunglasses that look awesome on me.
10. In no time at all I will be looking back on this time and wishing it wasn’t over.
The benefit of having a second child is that, from experience, you know that no matter what the phase or the irritating habits your kid may be going through, they will pass. This knowledge is infinitely important in that it can keep you going through the tough times by allowing you to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, Aline and I are on the brink of purchasing a couple of one-way tickets to Bellevue, but we will make it through, and we both know it. That, in and of itself, is enough.
-Matt
One thing that’s always helps me when dealing with a screaming baby is buying it clothes. Have you snooped around our online baby boutique, RedSparks
July 17th, 2009 at 1:20 am
Ahh The Wall. I spent significant time (not all at once) surviving this period of newborn “bliss” in our master bedroom closet with the door shut and my IPod firmly fixed in my ears. This of course was the only place I could not hear my daughter’s banche screams of doom. I don’t think I ever realized how much sleep deprivation messes with your head. Powerful stuff. Here’s hoping it’s a short stint for you.
Heather´s last blog ..A Day in the Life of Baby
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July 17th, 2009 at 1:46 am
Ah yes, we know the wall well. You’ll move through this just fine. Sounds like you have an excellent handle on it, but that really doesn’t make it all that much easier to deal with when it keeps popping up in front of you.
This may not make much sense. I’m dealing with my own wall at the moment constructed by a lack of sleep.
Chuck´s last blog ..ItzaWinner – ItzaBitza
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July 17th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
[in specific reference to your last paragraph]
I’m thinking that what this post really represents is that you have hit a significant (adult) milestone, Matt. Instead.of.a.wall.
Good for you, MyBlogFriend! What a GREAT list of ten! So true. Again I receive wisdom here in The Playpen without climbing the mount.
Barbara´s last blog ..A Perspective On Blogging
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July 20th, 2009 at 3:11 am
The Wall. hm, I didn’t know it would ever be surmountable, but at some point you will wake up and be all like, whew. I, too, am happy about the fact that I’m not dead.
Kori´s last blog ..Gone Fishing
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